Day 26 (or: Pizza. I want it. Badly.)

Day 26. Wow. I’ve been doing good things for almost 4 weeks. And 11 people are “following” me. And I was approached on the street by a friend/reader, who found the blog amusing. And my first complete stranger commented “I love this blog!”. And my best friend’s parents think I’ve found my calling (they may be right). And the first boy joined as a “follower.” And I’ve quit swearing, quit eating dairy/sugar/meat (more on this in a minute), adopted a healthier state of mind, baked cookies, bought coffee for a stranger, planted things, done nice things for family, observed eco-Sabbath’s, and 17 other nice things.

But not today. Today I did nothing. Nothing but write about doing nothing. And watching Lord of The Rings and Harry Potter. Those of you who know me, know that these are my stress busting fallback movies. I watch them compulsively and repeatedly in order to soothe an achy brain. Why’s my brain achy? Because I’ve got a lingering horrible cough from my three weeks of illness and in the last couple of days, I

(1) had an enormous fight with my bad-website-searching son (use your imagination), and

(2) had words with my mother, and

(3) had to hold my ground with the sneaky and pathetic Bad Relationship who I really care for.  The butt.  Yes. I told him to get lost. Again. This time it didn’t take me as long – only about 6 hours – you would have been proud, and

(4) suffered the brutal slings and arrows from a Besty (which was all for the best, she prompted me to stand my ground with Mr. Bad, but was really a painful thing). Boy was I up to my eyeballs in swear words. Good time to quit swearing, huh?

And (5) I may have also had a maple bar. Or two.

Can day 26 be about allowing myself to fall down a bit? Yes. I make up the rules. I’m glad you agree. And what’s more, I’m going to further someone else’s cheese habit. Day 26 of One Thousand Days I order pizza for the neighbor. Really good pizza. And I’ll watch the pizza delivery van drive up the street, and I’ll think about all that cheesy goodness, and I’ll remember that there are other people on this planet, and they might have difficulty in their lives and they might deserve cheese, too.

26 down, 974 to go.

Day 25 (or: F*** that!)

I have to start out by reporting that we’ve stumbled on the first thing that Holly doesn’t approve of. Or, at least the first thing that she’s told me she doesn’t approve of. Partially. I have the feeling that there’s going to be an overall lack of approval of today’s thing because, let’s face it, the hard “K” sound is so very satisfying.

You all are smart enough to figure this one out (the title gives it away, right?), but you’re probably interested in the nexus of the decision (whether or not you’re interested, I’m going to tell you, so sit down and shut the h*** up). That’s right, Day 25 of One Thousand Days I’m going to stop swearing. Right after I unleash an oh-so-satisfying litany of expletives directed at several to-remain-nameless (you know who you are) situations and people.

Basically, I’ve been scolded for swearing like a sailor. By my 12 year old. And frankly, swearing just makes me more angry, when I already feel like ripping someone’s head off (again, you know who you are). Honestly, I’m afraid that if I continue to swear, things may escalate to the point where I may just have to commit BadRelationship-icide.

Thank God there are helpful articles such as this one http://www.wikihow.com/Stop-Swearing to help me with my process. Apparently there are 213,114 other people interested in kicking the swearing habit, too (misery loves company). My favorite suggestion in this article is a warning: “If someone annoys you and you tell them to "truck off", then people will probably laugh at you. Try to ignore them.” Heh-heh. I feel better already. I’d better invest in rubber bands so I can smack my wrist every time I accidentally (I swear – no pun intended – it was an accident!) let out an occasional "d***", or a minor little "s***".

I spent a fairly entertaining morning finding a random insult generator, and a Shakespearian insult dictionary  (who knew that “The insults used today are used by the ignorant - base and coarse in comparison to the Great Bard!”)

I would just LOVE to tell someone they have “Blasting And Scandalous Breath.” Or call them a “Brazen- Faced Varlet” or a “Bacon-Fed Knave.”  Or say to someone:  "Bless me, what a fry of fornication is at the door!"

But, to follow up on Holly’s lack of approval, here’s the deal: Holly suggests (with a great deal of sentiment) that quitting swearing on the whole is in not a good deed. However, quitting swearing at certain people (you know who you are) may be. And another friend chimes in by saying that it’s the emotions behind the words that are the problem, not the words themselves.

So, if I call you a bat-fouling sniglet…that’s just as bad as calling you an as*h*l*? Geez what a conundrum. I mean it. Great googledy-moogledy, what am I supposed to do? Not feel like ripping someone’s head off? Oh. Yeah. How could I forget about Day 19?

Ah well, no more vocal pollution.

25 down, 975 to go.

Day 13 (or: Kan I have some Koffee?)

13. Not a lucky number. And on top of that, it’s Monday. And frankly the day started with a rather ugly little nudge. I suppose that’s the danger of being involved in a fairly public organization, and also in being involved in a social networking site. I did say I needed to give up Facebook (because of the time demands of this blog), and now that a negative intention and comment toppled me this morning, and made me feel inappropriate and ineffective, I say: “follow your own advice, knob-brain”.

I don’t know why other peoples business causes me angst. Frankly, I think part of the problem is that I’m half starved due to cheese, meat and sugar deprivation. Yeah. That’s it. And I’m cranky from withdrawals. Yeah. That’s it too.

Well, there’s nothing like doing something for someone else to spur an attitude adjustment, and if anyone needs an attitude adjustment, it’s me. On Day 13 of One Thousand Days, on my way to work, and a long day that will stretch into the late evening hours, I drive through the Kinetic Koffee Kompany espresso shop (purposefully chosen, for its Konnection to the Kinetic Sculpture Race, which makes me laugh), not for myself, but for the next person who is thirsty, and who needs a pick-me-up, and who is maybe grumbling about Monday. I paid for coffee for that person. And a tip for the barista. You’re welcome, whoever you are. Enjoy your Monday!

And because today, I needed a little extra help in doing my deeds, I share this limited list of lovely thoughts on generosity and giving, taken and edited from the Alpena College Volunteer Center. People all over the world make these kinds of efforts on a daily basis. Thankfully.

Inspiration:

Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world; indeed, it's the only thing that ever has.
Margaret Mead

Service to others is the payment you make for your space here on earth.
Mohammed Ali

The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.
Edmund Burke, British statesman and orator

Vision without action is a daydream. Action without vision is a nightmare.
Japanese Proverb

One is not born into the world to do everything but to do something.
Henry David Thoreau, poet, writer, philosopher

I shall pass through this world but once. Any good therefore that I can do or any kindness that I can show to any human being, let me do it now. Let me not defer or neglect it, for I shall not pass this way again.
Mahatma Gandhi

Everyone can be great because anyone can serve. You don't have to have a college degree to serve. You don't even have to make your subject and your verb agree to serve... You only need a heart full of grace. A soul generated by love...
Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

Treat people as if they were what they ought to be, and help them become what they are capable of being.
Goethe

Nothing is so contagious as example; and we never do any great good or evil which does not produce its like.
Francois de La Rochefoucauld

We make a living by what we do, but we make a life by what we give.
Winston Churchill

It is one of the most beautiful compensations of this life that no man can sincerely try to help another without helping himself.
Ralph Waldo Emerson

Living is the art of loving. Loving is the art of caring. Caring is the art of sharing. Sharing is the art of living.
If you want to lift yourself up, lift up someone else.
Booker T. Washington

How far you go in life depends on your being tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving and tolerant of the weak and strong.
George Washington Carver

No one is useless in this world who lightens the burden of it for someone else.
Benjamin Franklin

When you cease to make a contribution, you begin to die.
Eleanor Roosevelt

I am only one, but still I am one. I cannot do everything, but still I can do something; and because I cannot do everything, I will not refuse to do the something that I can do.
Edmund Everett Hale

No act of kindness, no matter how small, is ever wasted.
Aesop

The miracle is this - the more we share, the more we have.
Leonard Nimoy

We ourselves feel that what we are doing is just a drop in the ocean, but the ocean would be less because of that missing drop.
We can do no great things, only small things with great love.
Mother Teresa

13 down, 987 to go.