Sunday, September 9, 2012

Day 83 (Or: Stop! Collaborate and Listen!)

When in doubt, don't - Benjamin Franklin
When in doubt, do it - Oliver Wendell Holmes
When in doubt, tell the truth - Mark Twain
When in doubt, eat chocolate - me.

Into every life, a little doubt must creep.  A little:  "What the hell am I doing?"  A little:  "What the hell are YOU doing?"  A little: "FOR THE LOVE OF CORN, WHAT'S GOING ON HERE?"

When this happens to yours truly, I have a tendency to slide down a long slippery slope (lined with razor blades) of whininess, crabbiness, over-perfection, and ironically - avoidance.

Advice:  STOP!  Collaborate, and listen!  (Vanilla Ice - good in coffee, and good for a bit of comic relief...and...good for soothing a doubt riddled soul?)

Stop!  Hold it.  That's right, don't just gaze down the gaping maw of doubt, being ever drawn forward toward the things that might not even need to be asked, let alone have an answer.  Just check yourself before you wreck yourself, will you?

Collaborate! Good.  Now that you've pulled yourself back from the precipice, let's just see if we can put your head back on straight.  Let's get on that collaboration thing. I'm not sure what Vanilla Ice meant by "collaborate" (he goes on to describe how he "flows like a harpoon"...what a maniac), but what I mean when I say it is:

  • (1.) Friends are important, and they're really good at helping one get to the heart of the matter (even when we don't want to go there) - it's an even better experience when there's chocolate involved.  
  • So (2.) get with somebody else, get out of your own head, stop being so stinking self involved - give something, do something for others, be something other than what you're doubting.  It helps.  
  • (3.) Testing?  TESTING!  So...are you really in the rut you thought you were in?  Did you find something better to focus on?  Did you decide that you're sort of all right in a funny sort of a way?  Excellent.  That's as it should be.  You're awesome.  We're all awesome, really.  Even when we're full of doubt.  
  • Because (4.)  Doubt is an important part of the human process.  We question, and we solve.  That's what we do.  Drowning in doubt is one thing, but a healthy dose of doubt can nudge us toward something incredible, if we let it, if we don't dive face first into it, but instead gently take it in.

...And Listen!  Little doubt worms won't become big doubt worms if we ask ourselves daily what/who/why we are, and then answer...and then LISTEN.  Free journal (write and write and write), draw, intentional breathing, yoga, be with it.  IT being the question and the answer.  Listen to yourself, listen to friends, listen to the QUESTION in the doubt and the ANSWER in the dark.  It's all there, and these smaller questions, answered daily, are the key to living.

If Vanilla Ice says it's so, then it is.

Day 83 Down, 917 to go.

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